"If you love them more than the fight, end the fight. An apology loses its warmth if it waits too long. Do it now, before the years turn cold."
- James Clear
"Consistency enlarges ability."
- James Clear
"People often care about belonging more than they care about accuracy. We don't always believe things because they are factually correct. In many cases, we cling to beliefs that make us look good to the people we care about."
- James Clear
"The only way to develop true confidence is to earn it.
-The confidence that you can bounce back from failure is earned by working through previous failures.
-The confidence that you can deliver the speech is earned by the previous speeches you have given.
-The confidence that you can perform on game day is earned by the previous performances in practice.
In the beginning, you need enough courage to practice even though it may not go very well. And over time, as your skills improve, courage transforms into confidence. Courage first, confidence later."
- James Clear
"Boredom is a filter. Common ideas come before it. Uncommon ideas come after it. Sit with a project long enough to get bored with it, then sit a little more. The most useful insights bubble up after you get bored."
- James Clear
"Work hard on what comes easily."
- James Clear
"We often think that we want an open road and the ability to choose any direction for ourselves. But sometimes, what we need is a tunnel that can reduce our choices and send us in a focused direction."
- James Clear
"Praise others. It will bring them peace of mind.
Do not expect others to praise you. It will bring you peace of mind."
- James Clear
"Many frustrations are the result of unspoken expectations. Before you get too annoyed, make sure you are clearly expressing your thoughts."
- James Clear
"Take great care to avoid mistakes when the decision is hard to reverse.
But! If you make a mistake that is hard to reverse, there is no sense beating yourself up about it. Your responsibility is to make the best next choice given your current position. You must always make the most of the situation you are in.
Next play mentality."
- James Clear
"Chase your desired lifestyle, not your desired title. People are blinded by status and labels. Once you release the need for a specific title, there is almost always an easier path to living your preferred lifestyle."
- James Clear
"There are many elements of living a good life, but the first and most foundational is to love yourself and enjoy spending time with yourself.
Go do things on your own so you learn to trust your mind and view it as a welcome companion. If someone declared, "Tomorrow you must spend the day alone" the hope is that you would reply, "That sounds like a good day!"
The person who is at ease within finds every other space larger and more enjoyable."
- James Clear
"Strangely, life gets harder when you try to make it easy.
- Exercising might be hard, but never moving makes life harder.
- Mastering your craft is hard, but having no skills is harder.
-Uncomfortable conversations are hard, but avoiding every conflict is harder.
Easy has a cost."
- James Clear
"Whenever you are stuck searching for the optimal plan, remember:
Getting started changes everything."
- James Clear
"Many of our habits and beliefs are learned from those who raised us. Which family story are you unconsciously repeating and reenacting? How can you rewrite the script to liberate yourself and the next generation?"
- James Clear
"Practice the art of small daily discomforts. Modern life is optimized for convenience and comfort. Your food can be delivered straight to your door. Your car seats can be heated. Your favorite show is available at the press of a button.
We all enjoy convenience and comfort, myself included. But our bodies and souls yearn for challenge. We want to be stretched. A deeper satisfaction awaits after pushing yourself to learn a challenging concept or complete a humbling workout or have an important but difficult conversation.
Should the whole day feel difficult? No, I don't think that's necessary. But a good day — a meaningful and fulfilling day — requires small moments of discomfort. Growth demands discomfort. We need something to push against to learn how strong we can become."
- James Clear
"Three qualities that have nothing to do with talent or intelligence, but can make a dramatic impact on your results:
-Cheerful. You are pleasant to work with and generally raise the level of energy in the room.
-Accountable. You feel personally responsible for what you want to accomplish. It is not someone else's job. It's your job.
-Adaptable. You can find alternate paths to success. You don't need things to be a certain way to be happy."
- James Clear
"When I notice myself worrying about 'what other people will think,' I find I'm usually not worried about any single person's opinion.
If I pick a specific person, I'm rarely concerned about what they will think. What I fear is the collective opinion in my head. It's imaginary."
- James Clear
"Relationships are usually the most important thing.
If you want to achieve more, there is some relationship that can unlock better results. If you want to make a meaningful contribution, helping others is a great way to do it. If you simply want to be a little happier, life is often more fun when shared with someone.
Whatever you're trying to accomplish, relationships are probably the key to getting there. Take this idea seriously and spend a little time thinking about which relationships you need to build or invest in."
- James Clear
"There is an enormous difference between working hard on something that is a grind and working hard on something that comes easily to you.
Exceptional results almost exclusively happen when you work hard on an area where you have some natural aptitude. Play to your strengths."
- James Clear
"Education teaches you to analyze. Entrepreneurship teaches you to create.
The educated mindset is great at dissecting and criticizing. What did Shakespeare mean here? What were the major forces of this historical period? What is the limiting reagent in this chemical reaction?
The entrepreneurial mindset is great at building and improving. Design a better product. Craft a new marketing plan. Stop talking about what's wrong and make something better.
The trick is to keep learning, but to never lose your ability to build."
- James Clear
"Win the day and go on your way.
There are always doubts:
-But what if…
-Will I be able to…
-Should I be worried about…
Leave it be. Have the best day you can today. Win the moment in front of you right now."
- James Clear
"Don't let a title become a trap.
-"I have to be a doctor."
-"I need to get into that school."
- "I can't quit this job—it's Google."
There are many ways to live an amazing life. Stop thinking about the status of this particular title and focus on the substance of what you want. You’ll often find there are many ways to get similar amounts of joy, purpose, or freedom.
If you attach your happiness to a single path, you'll become blind to other wonderful opportunities around you. And many of them might be a better fit for you or deliver a similar result with less struggle. "
- James Clear
"Books are the nearest thing to a time machine humans have ever made."
- James Clear
"The beginning is mostly luck. The end is mostly choices."
- James Clear
"To improve, compare little things.
-marketing strategies
-exercise technique
-writing tactics
To be miserable, compare big things.
-career path
-marriage
-net worth
Comparison is the thief of joy when applied broadly, but the teacher of skills when applied narrowly."
- James Clear
"Time will multiply whatever you feed it.
Good habits make time your ally. Bad habits make time your enemy."
- James Clear
"Treat failure like a scientist.
Each attempt is an experiment. Each mistake is a clue.
You're not failing. You're refining."
- James Clear
"Worrying about the future is like watching a leaf fall and trying to predict where it will land. Stop trying to guess where the wind will blow and get to work."
- James Clear
"The secret to winning is learning how to lose. That is, learning to bounce back from failure and disappointment—undeterred—and continuing to steadily march toward your potential. Your response to failure determines your capacity for success."
- James Clear
"In some areas of life, your reputation is defined by your wins.
-Creative pursuits. One bestseller or hit song can erase the memory of the ones that didn't work.
-Entrepreneurship. People rarely remember your failed business ideas, only your winning ones.
In areas like these, your mistakes fade away and the breakthroughs last. But in other areas of life, your reputation is defined by your losses.
-Crime. You can drive safely 364 days a year, but one DUI changes everything.
-Ethics and morals. One unethical decision can ruin a reputation and destroy trust.
In areas like these, your mistakes linger and consistency is rewarded.
Some areas of life reward your best day. Others punish your worst day. Know which situation you're in, and you can better decide when to be risky and when to play it safe."
- James Clear
"Reminder: If someone is acting like an idiot, you can just move on and let them be wrong. You do not have a personal obligation to correct people who are committed to being stupid. Sure, sometimes you need to attempt to get on the same page, but usually you can simply reclaim your time and move on to more productive ventures."
- James Clear
"Remain playful as your responsibilities increase. It's easy to become serious when people and results depend on you, but nearly everyone's performance improves when they proceed lightly through the world."
- James Clear
"Take all the energy you spend on...
-worrying about the past
-worrying about the future
-worrying about what others think
-worrying about if you might fail
... and channel that energy into one useful action within your control."
- James Clear
"Success is largely the failures you avoid.
-Health is the injuries you don't sustain.
-Wealth is the purchases you don't make.
-Happiness is the objects you don't desire.
-Peace of mind is the arguments you don't engage.
Avoid the bad to protect the good."
- James Clear
"The way to help someone is not to critique what makes them smaller, but to encourage what makes them larger."
- James Clear
"Even bad luck is a source of opportunity—but only if you live each day as if that is true."
- James Clear
"The person who experiences the consequences should make the decision."
- James Clear
"You are as old as the risks you take. In many ways, aging is not the process of growing old, but rather the slow death of becoming overly protective, scared, and worried about losing what you have. Youth is found in the energy of going for it, taking the risk, and trusting that you'll figure it out along the way."
- James Clear
"To understand others, watch what they reward.
To understand yourself, watch what you envy."
- James Clear
"There are two ways to live a longer life:
1) Biologically. Extend the timeline between your birth and your death.
2) Psychologically. Fit more lives into whatever time you are given.
Make each decade rich with experiences and perhaps you can live a handful of lives before you are done."
- James Clear
"Four questions that can tell you a lot:
1. When you wake up, do you expect today to have many joys or many frustrations?
2. When presented with an opportunity, do you have a bias toward action or do you postpone decisions?
3. When things go well for others, do you enjoy cheering them on or do you hate to hear about their success?
4. When things go wrong, do you believe it is your responsibility to improve the situation or do you blame others?"
- James Clear
"Spend today interpreting whatever people do in the most generous way. See if you feel better as a result."
- James Clear
"Whether a decision is good or bad can change based on how you act after the choice is made.
You can't learn all the lessons beforehand. You learn a lot about what you want in a marriage after getting married. You discover what type of career you enjoy after doing a lot of work. And so it goes in nearly every area of life. In many cases, what you wish you knew ahead of time can only be learned after the decision is made.
So there is nothing left but to pay attention to what you like, continue to iterate, and commit to making the most of each opportunity. There is no perfect decision. Good decisions are made right after the fact."
- James Clear
"On funerals, loss, grief, friendship, and support:
It's not about knowing what to say. It's about being there when nobody knows what to say. The only thing people need to hear is, "You are not alone." And that doesn't require words. It just requires your presence."
- James Clear
"The world is big, but industries are small.
After a few years, everyone comes to know the quality of your work.
Reputation matters."
- James Clear
"People can sometimes be held hostage by their expectations. They have a dream of something they would like to achieve or a path they intend to follow, but their mindset falls apart when things don't work out how they had hoped.
The key is to reach for an extremely high bar, but to be adaptable enough to reframe the failures, disappointments, and defeats into fuel for the next thing. Give your best effort, but no matter how it works out, trust that life will be good for you. Focus on how the world is working with you, not against you.
Everything you are given is material for the next move. Everything."
- James Clear
"Your best performances will come when you are working in a way that is a full expression of you. The work becomes a natural display of your personality. This is when you not only get better results, but also love the activity — because in doing the craft, you feel alive."
- James Clear
"Beware the student of one teacher. A good idea spirals into dogma when it gets applied to everything and stretched beyond the areas where it is useful. Remain open and embrace a lot of teachers."
- James Clear
"Caring about everything is a disaster.
Caring about nothing is also a disaster.
Nurture the small pocket of things that truly matter to you."
- James Clear